Urn yearning

[Mary Mallozziberg]

An office game involving industrial [kettles] and masturbation. The aim of the game is to enter the office kitchen when no ones about and [nut one out] into the giant kettle, or urn, which dispenses boiling water for tasty warm beverages, without getting caught.
If you succeed, you gain the satisfaction of knowing people are [supping] on your jizz, and the respect of your co-workers who are also in on the game. If you fail, you are probably fired.