Neutral zone infraction

[Vania]

A sexual position involving an offensive lineman, a defensive lineman, and greasy twisted woman (frequently Asian). The [neutral zone infraction] occurs when the two opposing lineman [double penetrate] the woman orally and vaginally(frequently anally). The neutral zone infraction can only be official when the combined weight of all 3 members involved totals 650 lbs. Any illegal procedures that are a result of this, ie staring the opposing lineman in the eye, will result in instantaneous homosexuality and a [5 yard penalty] will be given