Retinal vaginitis

[Dave Paprocki]

Uncontrollable staring at a hot piece of ass.
Causes; Lululemon, bikinis, full lips, shiny hair, high heels, perky breasts, tight ass, short shorts and or a cute smile.
Symptoms include; [tunnel vision], sudden rapid heart beat, [shortness of breath], sweating, swelling of the penis, loss of cognition and lucid daydreaming.
Complications include; crashing your car, getting slapped by your girlfriend, whiplash, [fear and loathing], masturbation and downing multiple shots of Tequila in a feeble effort to gain the courage to talk to her.
Transmission occurs primarily at bars, beaches and the mall but can and does occur almost anywhere.