Instruction manual

[Little_Girl]

A short publication that would have saved you a lot of time if you bothered to read it. However, reading an instruction manual before attempting to assemble/use the product with which it came is a sure sign of mental and physical weakness.
Manuals come free with purchases of self-assembly furniture, electronic products, children’s toys and many, many other products.
Some of these products are so simple to use, (eg. A [padlock]) that a 55 page, multi-lingual, fully referenced [brochure] doesn’t really seem necessary
When writing an instruction manual, follow these simple rules and you can’t fail;

Make the pages from stiff, shiny paper so that it’ll only stay open at the right page with the help of a rock, a toolbox and a [dining room table] positioned on each corner.

Make an extensive ‘Contents Page’ using the smallest font available and ensuring that you number the chapters, sections and sub-sections. Do this even if you only have 3 pages.

If applicable, include an illustration of the parts the buyer SHOULD have received and make sure this includes a picture of the manual itself.

When you reach the English chapter, don’t be tempted to waste money on a [translator], as you can simply guess most English words and make up the rest as you go along.

Be sure to include diagrammatical information where appropriate – get a four year old child to help you with the drawings.

Make the [manuals] cover attractive to women so that they can sit on their comfy [sofas] and shout directions at their husband/boyfriend when they are doing perfectly well with superior [male intuition] (and [brute force])