Shrivelled

[Gregory]

A state of being, only diagnosed after a series of extremely poor/ smelly performances in an entities personal/ professional life. Being [shrivelled] is synonymous with cases exhibiting high levels of stupidity, disability or [muppetry]. As shrivellism is highly contagious to the un-shrivelled, care must be taken to isolate, and in extreme cases [incinerate], any shrivelled being found to be wriggling in the nearby vicinity.

[Luis Fok]

Wrinkled and shrunken, especially as a result of loss of moisture or old age.

[Zipporah Schumaker]

dry, smaller than normal, and covered with lines as if by crushing or folding: