Capybara bomb

[Merna]

Do you have an irrational, yet somehow compelling grudge against all of humanity, or even just some sections of it, like France, for example? Perhaps you have a point to make, but writing letters just doesnt cut it, and a big explosion would really help people to get the idea. If this is you, then see a doctor, you mad fucker, the [Capybara bomb] might be just what you need.
The Capybara bomb is a surprisingly successful stealth weapon composed of:

A [capybara]
[Dynamite]

The animal
Ah, the capybara, my old friend how you [lollop] through life, swimming in rivers and [snuffling] dung, all the while unaware that TERRORISTS! are seeking to use you in their nefarious plans. Never mind. Lets take a closer look at the furry little dope.
The capybara (Hydrochoerus hydrochæ[ris]) is a semi-aquatic herbivorous animal with a brain the size of a [tangerine]. Full-grown capybarae reach between 105 and 135 cm (40-55 in) in length. They are peaceful, fun-loving creatures that like dancing and poker. They look like giant [guinea pigs].
Most importantly, however, the average capybara can safely hold up to 7 sticks of [dynamite].
[The dynamite]
Any old dynamite will do. Just wash it, shove it in and go.
Advantages

Absolutely no one expects that a capybara is going to explode.
They are very docile and tolerant animals, and especially so when dynamite is being inserted.

A [capybara bomb] can be used pretty much anywhere but they are especially useful for TERRORISTS! who hate [zoos]. The range and damage capabilities of the device are limited to around 1 meter (3.2808399 feet). This is good for blowing up telephone boxes, small cars and litter bins.
Uses
If you want to blow up a really big thing, then youll need more than one capybara. A whole lorry load of capybarae could probably bring down a Wal-Mart, but if youre stopped for any reason, its going to be really hard to come up with a sufficiently good reason as to why you are driving a [consignment] of 500 capybarae with dynamite up their asses, to the Wal-Mart.